A Dutchman and a Brazilian celebrate Poland’s friendly win against Wales???
The match was played in the back garden of Leo’s holiday cottage in the Algarve using jumpers for goalposts. Billed as the “Borer in Vilamora”, the game had so much potential for riveting entertainment that a whole 300 people turned up to watch. We’re told that many sheep were lost that evening while the shepherds temporarily neglected their duties (leaving the door wide open for the sheep-worrying Welsh fans). Service was also reported to be slow in the local restaurant thanks to the temporary absence of waiting staff.
LEO – “Roger – I LOVE you!!” (followed by a lot of that gutteral spitting stuff that the Dutch do so well)
ROGER – “I love you too, Beenhakker!!”
LEO – “Roger, what’s with the Polish shirt?” (followed by more of that gutteral spitting stuff that the Dutch do so well)
ROGER – “What Polish shirt? This is the Brazilian 5th reserve side. Isn’t it?”
POLSKA – Biało-czerwoni!!!
Meeeeeenwhile, in Seville, England were getting their backsides whooped 2-0 by Spain.
“I am happy because I learned a lot – I spoke to the players and we know what we must do. It was very difficult but we knew it would be because Spain are one of the best teams in the world right now. It’s important to know where we are, what level we are at and what we have to do in order to get better.”
So said Gucci Capelluci, the England coach. Yes, you learned just how CRAP the England team is when it’s playing a proper football team and not Azerbaijan, Borneo or Tasmania!
Where you are – A long way from where you need to be
What level you’re at – A low one, some might say very low, even embarrassingly low, so low that an expert limbo dancer would say “Woah! That’s really low!”
What you have to do to get better – Not telling. That’s why you’re all paid millions a year, you should know this stuff.
Don’t you just lurv football.