Protestors block relocation of presidential palace

Plans to relocate Warsaw’s presidential palace to a “more suitable” location have been scuppered by street violence. Clashes between riot priests and angry protestors prevented officials from moving the building late last night in scenes that have been described as: “a fairly typical Wednesday evening.”

The palace on Krakowskie Przedmieście was chosen as a temporary location for the office of the Polish President in 1994 during a period of national upheaval. “We never expected presidents to still be here almost 20 years later,” said Father Hubert Hamar. “There are 16 major churches on this street and just one presidential palace; I think it’s clear which one has to go.”

Opponents of the relocation disagree: “Elected presidents are an integral and ancient part of this nation’s culture,” said a masked protestor on the scene, lying slightly. “The church shouldn’t be afraid of a little old-fashioned democracy.” As dusk descended on the second day, protesters began to chant: “We are prepared to slightly inconvenience ourselves on the weekends for justice!”

The not very long-running protests over the fate of the presidential palace have deeply divided the nation. Many Poles are now saying that democratic rule was given unhealthy and unfair advantages in the famous 1993 concordat with the nation’s mohair-wearing grandmothers. Elected representatives are allowed to speak directly to voters and influence them through daily news and current-affairs programs.

The final destination of the presidential palace has not been revealed for security reasons but there is speculation that the building may be placed next to the national parliament, on a small flood-prone island in the Vistula or in Brussels.

President Komorowski was unavailable for comment because he was playing with his train set.

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10 thoughts on “Protestors block relocation of presidential palace

  1. Bartek says:

    The photo is outdated – there’s no cross outside the palace. This is a crying shame!

    The palace is set to be moved to Złote Tarasy so that Scatts and I may pop in for a lunch (cooked by Mrs Kaszalot) and afterwards play with Bronek’s train.

    Holy cow! Island1 has updated his photo and no longer looks like Dan Aykroyd!

  2. bob says:

    The structure should be put on a lorry so it can be relocated as often as the political climate in Poland changes – an hour by hour occurrence.

    Also we believe that the bottom of the cross should be affixed to a skateboard so it can easily be moved.

  3. island1 says:

    I like it, sort of a presidential Winnebago. In fact, the entire government could be put in caravans and wander the country like a subsidized Roma colony.

    I think the idea of wheeled crosses, like wheeled statues of JPII, that can be rolled into position at a moment’s notice is one that is bound to occur to somebody at some point. I’m not convinced it’s going to make them easier to move though.

  4. island1 says:

    I’m convinced Bronek has a train set. If he was English, he would definitely have a train set.

  5. Cosi says:

    JPII on a skateboard would be nice…

  6. Bartek says:

    He is Polish, although some of the compatriots say he’s a Russian secret agent. If he was Russian, what toy would he have?

    In Poliand we have a bawdy joke – “train sets are like boobs – designed for small boys, but usually big boys play with them”.

    Hope you won’t moderate me out of the thread!

  7. island1 says:

    Thermonuclear weapons?

    Boobs are wasted on small boys.

  8. polkaontheisland says:

    Brussels – lovely idea. I vote for it. It’s much closer to Amsterdam. We might get some better tempered politicians if they were allowed to lunch in Dam. We could then shut the borders and be rid of them…

  9. scatts says:

    Yo dudes! I see, Jamie has dug up his uncle Chuck’s Yearbook Photo from Utah High and is using it as his avatar.

    What readers need to know is that I’m the only Polandian who actually looks better in real life than his avatar! [Chuckle]

    I’m all for moving the palace but keeping the cross. Then for building a massive monument to Kaczyński where the palace once stood to be used as a site of GLOBAL adoration of the great one who was so sadly taken from us at the peak of his benevolence. And probably some religious stuff as well.

  10. Sylwia says:

    scatts: “Then for building a massive monument to Kaczyński where the palace once stood to be used as a site of GLOBAL adoration of the great one who was so sadly taken from us at the peak of his benevolence.”

    If you listened carefully you’d know that he wasn’t taken from us, he fell in battle.

    polkaontheisland: “We could then shut the borders and be rid of them…”

    Yep, I always thought it’s pretty obvious that Poles really don’t want any politicians here.

    Great post, Jamie!

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