Anti-corruption fail

So I’m poking around on the website of the Central Anticorruption Bureau (important journalistic research doncha know) and it occurs to me to wonder what I would do if I was foreigner wanting to report a heinous act of corruption—like my wife scoffing all the Christmas fruit cake for example. I clicked over to the helpfully provided English-language version and followed the links. The results were… discouraging

English-language home page of the Central Anticorruption Bureau.

Hooray, a questionnaire! Kliknąć!


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17 thoughts on “Anti-corruption fail

  1. iceteajunkie says:

    Haha, they “fixed” it by redirecting to Polish version of the form :D Full pro.

  2. bob says:

    Jamie – Had to check it out.

    @ice is correct, it defaults to a Polish page with the ‘questionnaire’ . And it is not a questionnaire at all, it is a blank space to write your issues in.

    As in many, many cases – they are close but have not completed the task either by taking a short-cut/easy way out or just missing the concept.

    As Ewa and I frequently say with the myriad things like this we see in Poland daily; even with the advances and changes from 1989 it is ‘SP’ (Still Poland). 2 steps forward and always one back.

    By the way, since you were not able to get to said questionnaire, we took the liberty of making up a story about you and putting it into the questionnaire. I suspect you will have a visit from the boys in the blue jackets soon after they wake up from their New Year’s kac. (something about smuggling pierogies from Poland to the UK)

  3. kuba says:

    From IT guy point of view someone simply did mistake in domain – certificate was issued for and you entered which is not that same (from certificate point of view). Stupid mistake but happens quite often on many sites.

  4. Steve says:

    This is getting silly.

    Smuggling pierogies from Poland to the UK only becomes murder when they are served to unsuspecting victims: it is therefore purely a matter for the British police.

    Interesting, though, that the CBA “is competent in:
    1. criminal investigation,
    2. corruption prevention,
    3. anticorruption information,
    4. operational activities.”

    What is it incompetent in?

  5. Malcolm says:

    Please refer to the opening paragraph of the page titled ‘Role and Activities’:

    According to the provisions of the Bill of 9 June 2006, the Central Anticorruption Bureau is competent in:

    So, ‘apparently’ they are competent. Stop your complaining!

  6. scatts says:

    Dear CBA,

    Nice badge. Did you get someone over from Marvel comics to draw it up for you?

    “If it is not possible for you to visit our offices in person during working hours we would be happy to arrange a meeting at a more convenient time (or place).”

    My faktura is in the post.

    Oh, and can you please start with the obvious things like the areas where shed-loads of money has been spent but nothing has actually materialised – i.e. roads.

    Then the areas where loads of dosh has been spent on things that are utterly pointless and annoying – i.e. red and white pavement sticks

    Lastly on things where bewildering decisions have been made with no apparently good basis for making them – i.e. too many to mention.

  7. The artwork at the top of the CBA website is laughable. As anyone using a camera everyday, you cradle the lens with your left hand from below, not from the side. The camera itself is a Soviet-made Zenit TTL dating back over 30 years. Is this the kind of kit they issue CBA agents in the Digital Age?

  8. island1 says:

    It wasn’t me guv!

  9. guest says:

    At least Poland does not lose personal or top secret data. Which happened in the UK on regular basis.

    ‘SUK’ = still UK ;)

  10. odrzut says:

    all of the above, when suspect is from the gov

  11. odrzut says:

    I thought in English “the” is like Polish “kurwa” – you can optionally put it anywhere in your sentence.

    [sorry, I tidied up the comments before seeing this one and so guest’s accidental use of “the” that this refers to has been removed – editor]

  12. island1 says:

    Yeah, I’m sure that’s never happened in Poland.

  13. Decoy says:

    Everytime I see CBA, it makes me think of the saying “Couldn’t Be Arsed”…

  14. Pistefka says:

    In Hungary CBA is a chain of little corner shops which are slightly but irritatingly more expensive than they should be, and invariably have very narrow aisles. My local branch can nver manage to put the different types of bread next to the relevant prices, so the cost of the bread is always a surprise when you get to the checkout.
    Not sure if they do much about corruption, but they certainly have their incompetences.

  15. odrzut says:

    Feel free to remove this comment also – it isn’t as funny as I thought it will be.

  16. moda says:

    Hej wszystkim, mam takie same zdanie jak powyżej.

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