Tag Archives: Churchill

12 warning signs Poland should have

Visitors to Poland could use a few official warning signs to help them cope. Here are twelve signs I would like to see put up at strategic locations around Poland’s tourist spots.

bald-heads

Men with shaved heads are not necessarily ex-convicts or skinheads (though they might be)

* * *

no-churchill

Churchill is not as universally popular as you might have been led to believe

* * *

no-change

This shop has no change, and by the time you leave neither will you

* * *

proper-dancing

Proper dancing, with feet, is expected in this area

* * *

moustaches

High risk of non-ironic 70s-style moustaches in this area

* * *

handshake

Handshaking is required at ALL times

* * *

polish-women

Hordes of ridiculously attractive women – please watch where you are walking

* * *

fatbelly

Wedding feast area – do not attempt to eat everything

* * *

tourist-area

Designated English-tourist area – men wearing dresses may not leave this zone

* * *

tongue-twister

High risk of Polish tongue twisters

* * *

mixing-drinks

Do not drink between vodka shots

* * *

stereotypes

Non-stereotype zone – expectations of tractor factories and food queues will not be met

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